The perfect basset-cessory

It would hardly be an exaggeration to say that Lord Bassington-Bassington likes to accessorize, whether we're talking about bow ties or, well, more eccentric accoutrements.

A nice thing to liven up an otherwise down-to-earth outfit is the thing known in modern parlance as bling, which His Lordship is also quite fond of. Indeed, he could even be accused of joining clubs to get even more such accessories.

So imagine the droopy-eared's delight when he received this generous gift from in-laws, a lovely hand-crafted pin that is a perfect depiction of the above young lady, the lovely Balbina – award-winning member of the extended Mju clan.

The silver pin is indeed the perfect accessory, and gives even the sturdiest Harris tweed a touch of velvety basset-eariness. But it works particularly well with Lord Bassington-Bassington's recently acquired summer tweed jacket.

This might well lead to some outrageous style experiments, because His Lordship finally has a tweed jacket that can be worn with shorts. A bit over the top, perhaps, but hey – it's all about basset pride, saying it loud, being tricolor and proud and all that.

As one says in India, as important as having a good spouse is to get good in-laws. And we can safely say that Lord Bassington-Bassington is lucky enough to be very well off on both regards.

Vinyl wormwood

(Przybyszewski used as a model by his friend, Norwegian symbolist painter Edward Munch)

Malört forlag, one of Scandinavia's coolest small presses and probably the world's best dressed publisher, has released records before. But this time they've come up with the splendid idea of issuing a little seven inch on vinyl, which instantly endears them even more to Lord Bassington-Bassington's heart.

The release is intended as a companion disc to an upcoming release of a selection of works by Polish decadent writer Stanislaw Przybyszewski, known for his occult proclivities. Indeed, according to scholar Per Faxneld Przybyszewski might be the first person in history to construct a coherent philosophy around Lucifer as a positive symbol. So no wonder that they describe his novel Satans Kinder (a true European, Przybyszewski wrote in both Polish and German) as a "Satanic Anarchist novel". How can one resist?!

And the book wouldn't be complete without this little seven inch. It contains contributions by three very interesting artists, namely Blixa Bargeld (known for his work with The Bad Seeds and Einstürzende Neubauten), drone metal maestro Stephen O'Malley (Sunn O)))) and Jill Tracy, who each deliver a specially written track. And of course this little gem is strictly limited.

So go get it already, and tell 'em a certain long-eared Lord sent you.

Cash from ZOAS

It's a always nice when one's friends start some sort of exciting project. And when it is in a field dear to the heart of Lord Bassington-Bassington, such as small press publishing, it is especially thrilling.

So His Lordship would like to help, in whatever small way, promote the new publishing venture of his dear friends that he just likes to refer to as the Somersetians.

(Austin Osman Spare)


Based in England (but recently moved away from Somerset), ZOAS Press specializes in Polish-language editions of rare, esoteric books. So far, ZOAS has produced one title by artist Austin Osman Spare, a towering figure in modern magic(k) and occulture, and one by the considerably more obscure occult poet Boleslaw Wójcicki. The books are truly amazing to behold, real works of art and passion.

If you can read Polish, or if you area collector of the esoteric or just appreciate beautiful books, you owe it to yourself to cruise by their website.

Poland to Paris

Because Lord Bassington-Bassington can never resist a good pseudo-Constructivist poster. And because His Lordship can't resist the idea of Frenchmen bringing the best of Poland to Paris.

Bassetocracy now!

Lord Bassington-Bassington is tired of your man-made political ideologies. They have failed because they are just as defective as the naked apes that made them. It is time to hand over the reins to someone with better priorities.



Lord Bassington-Bassington is already aboard the Basset revolution. His Lordship thinks you should join him. Get your propaganda from here.

Forest smells and bluebells

Lord Bassington-Bassington is fond of ambient music of the darker kind. And so it is with great joy that he just received the latest release from Artefactum, one of his favourites in the field.

Foxgloves and Bluebells is the name, and it has just come out on the New Polish label Ur Muzik. This, it seems, is the perfect ambient record for the spring evenings that finally seem to be a reality here at Bassington Manor.



Mrs. d’Erlette

Artefactum has always been relatively free of the clichés that make much dark ambient music so uninspiring. While many dark ambient acts make you want to kill yourself as a sacrifice to Satan, Artefactum makes you want to go for a stroll in the woods.

And on this release, Merissa d’Erlette breaks with the "sonic wallpaper for tombs" formula altogether. Foxgloves & Bluebells is a toidy step towards folk music, perhaps nudged a bit on the way by folk singer extraordinaire Andrew King (who makes a guest appearance). Indeed, the record at times feels like lost bits from the soundtrack to The Wicker Man.

Lord Bassington-Bassington holds that any good ambient record should be possible to fall asleep to. And his lordship feels certain that if he drifts off to the gentle sounds of Foxgloves & Bluebells he will have pleasant dreams about dancing faeries.



(Picture by Elisabeth Fraser.)

Spitfire polish

While hunting for some new winter boots, Lord Bassington-Bassington came across these pictures on a website selling finer footwear, and felt the need to share them with the readers of the Chronicles. Not just because the boots are rather fine, but because the man who wears them might very well be the most stylish person in the world.



While overalls is not a natural first choice of attire for the well-dressed gentleman, Mr. Brown overrules all normal rules of dress. For not only does Mr. Brown sport immaculately polished boots, he flies a Spitfire for a living. A Polish Spitfire.



As the pictures from this news story shows, Mr. Brown even has a taste for stylish neckwear.



Overall it is, it seems, impossible to be more dashing than Mr. Brown. Unless, of course, one is John Steed. Or is equipped with the natural elegance of a Basset hound.

While it's probably unrealistic to try to get a job in the same field as Mr. Brown, these pictures does remind Lord Bassington-Bassington that there are some very nice Spitfire cufflinks on offer. Perhaps it's time to invest in a pair.

Polish music: Chopin, by Pollini

We here at the Chronicles conclude our week of national mourning with music by Fryderyk Franciszek Szopen, Poland’s greatest musical gift to the world. Chopin's (as his surname is more usually spelled) nocturnes rank among his most treasured works, and Italian pianist Maurizio Pollini is among the greatest living interpreters of his music. So there should be little wonder that Pollini's collection of Chopin nocturnes rank among the most frequently played records of all time here at Bassington Manor.



As Poland's national mourning comes to an end and the country returns to normality, we here at Bassington Manor look forward to returning to normal (i.e. silly) as well.

And on the subject of Poland, it's the 600th anniversary of the Battle of Grünwald, subject of Jan Matejko's monumental painting and one of Lord Bassington-Bassington's favourite artworks.

Polish music: Horologium

More Polish music. This time Industrialists Horologium.

Polish music: Artefactum

In light of the national tragedy we will focus on Polish music during this week of mourning.

This is a rare track by Artefactum, one of our favourite dark ambient acts.

We stand with Poland

We here at the Chronicles stand with Poland on this day of her grief.

It is a bitter irony that so many of those chosen by Poles to represent their interests died underway to commemorate the attempt by Communism to eradicate their very soul.

We would like to express our sympathy and solidarity towards Poles everywhere and choose this opportunity to cast our eyes back on one of Poland's first elected Prime Ministers, Ignacy Jan Paderewski, whose Polonia Symphony so eloquently captures the character of Poland and its people.

History shows us that while the Polish eagle might be wounded, it will always continue to soar.

The Chronicles: Now with naked bitches!

Lord Bassington-Bassington has been informed that a sure way of increasing the traffic on a page on the World Wide Web is to publish pictures of attractive and scantily clad ladies.

So here is a picture of the charming Miss Brenda, a Polish lady of great distinction.

Female esoterica, fine electronica

Given his well-known weakness for things Polish and ambient, Lord Bassington-Bassington finds it imperative to inform the public about the new release from Polish outfit Artefactum.

The lady behind Artefactum goes by the nom de plume of Merissa d’Erlette, and has released a small tricle of records since her project’s inception in 2001.

His Lordship has been playing Artefactum CD’s like Chaos Elements (Athanor records) and the self-produced Rosarium Hermeticum a lot. And not only because the themes that run through the (usually instrumental) music, like esotericism and alchemy, are ideas he has a long-standing interest in (he also shares Mrs. d’Erlette’s love of roses).



The Artefactum records also show a promising curve of development, as each new release seems to show increasing richness in both musical contents and the packaging of the records themselves. Oh, and for the record: Lord Bassington-Bassington holds that those of you who claim that packaging of a record doesn’t matter are either liars or have no sense of aesthetics. He is unsure which trait he thinks is the worst.

That is why Lord Bassington-Bassington is so pleased with Artefactum’s latest release, as its sonic richness is only matched by its lavish packaging. Sub Rosa is like a small nugget of gold found in the ashes of an alchemist’s athanor. (Yes, I could have written “furnace” or “oven”, but then I would miss out on an opportunity to satisfy my addiction to atrocious alliteration).



The seven-inch record (that’s a “single”, for those of you who are stuck in the digital age) is produced on stunning, bright pink vinyl, packaged in a hand-made sleeve and sealed with a pink ribbon. It contains two tracks, titled Rosa Alba and Rosa Rubea, both of which are examples of Artefactum at its (or her) best. Dark and brooding, yet gentle and inviting, soundscapes filled with little details that create a meditative atmosphere.

His Lordship feels certain that the pink vinyl and ribbon, as well as the little heart-shapes perforations on the cover, will make some feminists yak on about ”internalising female stereotypes” or something to that effect. However, His Lordship, who deeply regrets that he doesn’t look good in pink himself, would tell them to sod off (although in much more civilised terms, of course). For, as pictures of Mrs. d'Erlette reveals, her taste is clearly above criticism.



Sub Rosa is released by Drone Records, in 300 copies. Every lover of ambient music should have one of these in his record collection, where the little pink-ribboned beauties will no doubt charm the other records into buying them flowers.

Lord Bassington-Bassington, rock ’n' roller

Or, at least, rock ’n' roll press release writer…

With a physique like Lord Bassington-Bassington’s, one isn’t exactly “born to rock”. Even if one might argue that floppy ears are perfect accessories for headbanging, and that their velvety feel gives His Lordship sorely needed Goth points, His Lordship has largely given up on wearing leather pantaloons.

However, he is undoubtedly interested in the music of Swedish Industrial outfit Coph Nia. He especially enjoys their collaborative efforts with the group Mindspawn, which has produced dark-ambient music perfect for late nights at Bassington Manor in the company of a good book and good port.



So when asked whether he would like to write the press relase for Coph Nia’s latest record, His Lordship enthusiastically agreed. And not just because it’s released by a Polish record label (His Lordship likes Poles), the fact that Coph Nia guys are super guys or even that the word “money” was mentioned. No, His Lordship really liked the record.

So here is Lord Bassington-Bassingtons attempt to help Coph Nia flog their music to an unwary public:

It's hardly news to any connoisseur of Industrial music that Coph Nia like to cover songs. So far they have quite a cover track record. They've transformed The Leather Nun's punk anthem "Prime Mover" into a brooding, industrial soundscape, and made songs by artists as diverse as Front 242, Bauhaus, Arthur Brown and The Rolling Stones their own.

One danger of covering songs is that you might end up as a covers band. This is especially dangerous if you cover songs by, say, The Rolling Stones, as you might just end up on the rock cover band circuit – playing 'Sweet Home Alabama' in dodgy rock pubs and biker meets in places God has been drinking to forget ever since he created them.

On the other end of the scale, but equally degrading, is to end up as wedding singers. Remember that really unfunny Adam Sandler movie?



If you think that Coph Nia has too much class to end up en either category, well, let's say you have too much faith in the band. Coph Nia are already a bit too familiar with playing gigs in dodgy pubs, and they've even played at a wedding (well, it was my stag party, but it was definitely wedding-related).

So in a desperate attempt to not end up having to provide the soundtrack to bikers picking up underage chicks or obscure uncles doing moves from Saturday Night Fever, Coph Nia have decided to take the demon by the horns, and tried to exorcise the Cover Demon before it consumes them.

The result is this release. This collection of Coph Nia-fied covers including Ozzy Osbourne's "Mr Crowley", the song Mr. Aldenon's band was born to cover, "Black Sabbath" by the band of the same name, "Sick Things" by Alice Cooper and "Levitation" by psychedelic space rockers Hawkwind.

Hopefully, the exorcism will work. If not, you know where to look for Coph Nia in a few years...

Lord Bassington-Bassington

Little Storping in the Swuff, November 2008

PS: If you need a band for your wedding, Coph Nia can be reached through their website.