Out waddling

Lord Bassington-Bassington is out for a small waddle and will be back in about a week. Perhaps bearing some new tweeds and bow ties.

In the meantime, here's a song to keep the readers of the Chronicles amused.

West Hound?

While Lord Bassington-Bassington usually dislikes clothes bearing logos, there are some exceptions. On a polo shirt a discreet logo, such as a crocodile or laurel wreath, can add a small splash of colour.

And speaking of laurel wreaths, Fred Perry have reissued two classic polo shirts that are both stylish and classic and perhaps suitable for the hottest days of the year. We here at Bassington Manor have Perry shirts that are going on 17 years now, but it's perhaps time to expand the collection a little.



But which is best? The 1957 model with the classic West Ham colours?



Or the Perry Boy shirt?

While the maroon shirt is Lord Bassington-Bassington's favourite, it is a concern that wearing it might be seen as a show of support for football. His Lordship, of course, approves only of sports such as cricket or elephant polo.

Bassetocracy now!

Lord Bassington-Bassington is tired of your man-made political ideologies. They have failed because they are just as defective as the naked apes that made them. It is time to hand over the reins to someone with better priorities.



Lord Bassington-Bassington is already aboard the Basset revolution. His Lordship thinks you should join him. Get your propaganda from here.

Summer solstice

Town travel

Tweeds by Walker Slater.

Hey Dude

Because King Dude is quite a charming little band. And because the combination of music and ritual behaviour is something Lord Bassington-Bassington finds endlessly fascinating.



Lord Bassington-Bassington is familiar with King Dude only through their split 7 inch with Of the Wand and the Moon, but will definitely have to get some more records by this intriguing act.

Radical dandyism

While it’s hardly a secret that Lord Bassington-Bassington has sympathies with what could broadly be termed the political Right (in its more moderate forms, he eschews extremism). But His Lordship has always steadfastly refuses to let squabbles about such inconsequentialities as politics or religion stand in the way of enjoying life.

So His Lordship was most enlivened by stumbling across one of the most entertaining left-wing blogs he has ever seen. Dear readers of the Chronicles, meet the Worker-Dandyist International. This excellent blog provides a left-wing analysis of current society that is surprisingly similar to Lord Bassington-Bassington’s own views, something which only strengthens His Lordship’s opinion that sensible people come in all political and religious persuasions.



While the Worker-Dandyist International has a consistently high quality in its post, Lord Bassington-Bassington, being a hound after manifestoes of all sorts, was especially taken with its Worker-Dandyist Manifesto.

Some of its highlights:
“4. We define our Dandyism, in essence, as simply making as much of an effort as possible with the limited resources availabhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifle. An effort in sartorial flair and individuality, an effort in civility, social responsibility and courtesy, and an effort in communal culture, welfare and hedonism. Our definition of Dandyism will most certainly conflict with the pompous elitists’ definition of Dandyism. Of course, we embrace and encourage popinjays, peacocks and coxcombs but we shall dispense with the conceitedness associated with such terms in favour of community and kindness.”

“5. The Worker-Dandy opposes sweatshop labour, child labour and forced labour. If you paid £5 for a new skirt then someone, somewhere has been paid, at most, pennies to manufacture it. The Worker-Dandy will never knowingly contribute to such exploitation.There are many ways and means of dressing well. Slavery is not one of them.”




And as a long-time skeptic, Lord Bassington-Bassington simply loved this point:
“9. Worker-Dandyism is rational and therefore vehemently opposed to quackery. Pseudo-science is a leech that feeds on humanity both economically and physically. Reflexology, homeopathy, magnet therapy, etc., are all bunk. Snake-oil salesmen have always exploited the gullibility and desperation of the sick for financial ends and, while people are free to dispose of their earnings as they please, when people are discouraged from seeking proven medical treatment in favour of junk remedies we regard this as tantamount to criminal assault.”


Ladies and gentlemen, whatever your own politics, you are cordially invited to enjoy the Left, possibly at its best, but certainly at its best dressed.

Now, why does this it seem that this superb slice of socialist soul-pop should be playing in the background while looking at the website?

Chap battle

As anyone with the barest grasp of musical history is aware, history is full of rap battles. One of Lord Bassington-Bassington's favourites being shown below.


But the greatest battle yet, the Trafalgar or Kursk of rap battles, must surely be the one between Lord Bassington-Bassington's favourite chap-hop artist, Mr. B the Gentleman Rhymer, and his arch-enemy Professor Elemental. Watch these two chaps battle it out in the way it should be done - using Queensbury rules and utterly without baseball caps.

Sexism in canvas

Finding acceptable casual shoes for the summer is always hard, as there are many horrid types of footwear out there.

So Lord Bassington-Bassington was happy to find these nice little numbers by Keds. The Champion Spectator is nothing less than a casual shoe inspired by those most stylish of shoes, the spectator. But, shockingly, Keds only makes them for females.

This blatant sexism is simply unacceptable!

Lord Bassington-Bassington - artist

These days, it seems that anything can be art provided it is placed in an artistic context. And if it is indeed art, it goes without saying that it should be funded by taxpayers. So, unsurprisingly, Lord Bassington-Bassington has decided that His Chronicles are some sort of ongoing social art project. And as we quite like manifestoes here at the Bassington Manor, it is only appropriate to give His Lordship himself an opportunity to proclaim the purpose of this artistic project.

My work explores the relationship between postmodern discourse and urban spaces. With influences as diverse as Derrida and John Cage, new synergies are created from both explicit and implicit meanings.

Ever since I was a child I have been fascinated by the ephemeral nature of relationships. What starts out as vision soon becomes corrupted into a tragedy of power, leaving only a sense of chaos and the inevitability of a new reality.

As temporal forms become frozen through emergent and personal practice, the viewer is left with a statement of the limits of our condition.

Oh, and Lord Bassington-Bassington would also like to recommend the Artsy Bollocks Generator, and thank Miss Oda Rygh for bringing it to His attention.

Now - where's that grant money!?



(Picture shamelessly stolen from here. For, as Oscar Wilde once remarked, "talent borrows, genius steals". And Lord Bassington-Bassington is clearly a genius).

Chanteuse in distress rescued

A while back, Boston-based singer Marissa Nadler sent out a request for assistance to be able to afford recording her new album. Lord Bassington-Bassington, being what one could perhaps describe as a "fan" of Miss Nadler's music, happily signed up to support this worthy cause.



And just a few days ago, the finished result arrived, in the form of a signed LP and extra CD. The new album, simply entitled Marissa Nadler,
is, to put it frankly, quite wonderful. Ghostly sounds for the slowly unfolding summer.



Those of you who didn't run to the rescue of this chanteuse in distress can still get the record from normal channels. However, the LP/CD deal means that Lord Bassington-Bassington has a compact disc to get rid of. Does anybody want to trade?

Mystical ties

As any creative person knows, even the most innocuous comment can create chains of association that leads one towards profound insights.

The other way, a generous gift of delicious dog biscuits from some commentators on the Chronicles' post about neofolk bling set Lord Bassington-Bassington thinking.



Of course, like any true Basset Hound, Lord Bassington-Bassington likes dog biscuits immensely, but there was something about the shape of the biscuits that reminded so much of one of His Lordship's other great passions. Namely the bow tie.



(Bow tie by Drakes of London).

Of course, this similarity in shape between dog biscuits and bow ties cannot be coincidental. They must be indicative of some deep, mystical bond between canine and these wonderful things.

A mystical tie, perhaps?



(Art stolen from here).

The Villa Festival

If you find yourself in Italy late this summer, it appears that you could do worse than drop by the Villa Festival.

The Villa Festival 2011 Slideshow: Villa’s trip to Magione, Umbria, Italia was created by TripAdvisor. See another Magione slideshow. Create your own stunning slideshow with our free photo slideshow maker.

Half-canvas shoes

seem ideal for the summer. And Herring Shoes seem to make some ideal examples. But which model to go for?

The traditonal brogue?


The more unorthodox monkstrap?


Or these outrageous tasseled loafers?


These are important decisions indeed. For the selection of footwear can have serious consequences for one's life, as evidenced by the case of slippers.

Old men are cooler than you, part three

In our series documenting how old men are cooler than you, we've taken a look at Sikhs and retired officers. Now it is time to spotlight one of Lord Bassington-Bassington's personal heroes.

While Lord Bassington-Bassington feels that any gentleman (or gentlehound) should be open to the possibilities of magick and the joy of mystery, and that any blog can benefit to both from fatwas and pastoral care, Lord Bassington-Bassington remains a staunch Caninist.



And His Lordship finds few people more inspiring to the committed Caninist than James Randi, who has spent a large part his life debunking fraudulent claims of the supernatural. Lord Bassington-Bassington also admires how, even if Mr. Randi himself is an atheist, he makes a point of respecting and cooperating with decent individuals of other persuasions.

He has been hanging upside down over the Niagara Falls in a straitjacket. For a while, it was his job to guillotine Alice Cooper on stage. He travels the world in a black cape and a fedora adorned with peacock feathers. It was also touching how Mr. Randi, then already an octogenarian, made the choice of coming out as a homosexual.

In other words, Mr. Randi might be the coolest person alive. He is certainly cooler than you. He probably dresses better, too.



We here at the Chronicles, who were lucky enough to be Mr. Randis hosts on his recent visit to Little Storping-in-the-Swuff, can only hope that some of that cool rubbed off on us. And we are very grateful for the peacock feathers sent by Mr. Randi from his personal peacock flock.



Perhaps it is finally time to join the James Randi Educational Foundation.

Reissue of the year: Karjalan Sissit

The reissue of the year is here, at least as far as Lord Bassington-Bassington is concerned.

Eternal Soul Records have produced a stunning 10-year anniversary edition of Karjalan Sissit's Miserere album, originally on legendary (in Lord Bassington-Bassington's circles anyway) Cold Meat Industry. Released only on CD back in 2001, it is now given a luxurious vinyl treatment which still suits Karjalan Sissit's brand of misantropic, vodka-fuelled Industrial, owing as much to Black Metal as it does to Sibelius.




Eternal Soul have done a superb job, the gatefold cover in classic "martial industrial/military pop" field grey opens to reveal a hilarious shot of Karjalan Sissit captain Make Pesonen in full "drunken Finn" mode. All hail ethnic stereotypes!



There's also an equally charming poster included. In other words, great stuff all around.

A canine cover

Lord Bassington-Bassington came across this Norwegian trade magazine in a friend's restaurant, and couldn't help share the cover with His readers. His Lordship is quite confident that if more magazines had covers as stylish as this, print media wouldn't be in the rut it's in.



Illustration by Børge Bredenbekk.